Feature · relationship

THE SEX TAPE

Hello Trybe!!!!

Its been a hot weekend, so hot that the make up on my face has turned my face into two different countries.Hope you have been keeping cool out there.

Empires have risen after viral sex tapes hit the internet. One of the first names that come to my mind when i hear the word “Sex tape” is Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian. Apart from their sex tape which probably yielded a lot of money, the attention the media gave them allowed them to craft into a lot of store departments selling their own branded products. Do you see where this got them? Other celebrities who have done sex tapes are

Pamela Anderson

Hulk Hogan

Eve

Jennifer Lopez

Kid Rock

Tila Tequila

And so on…..

So what on earth would make a person record their sexual escapades or should i call them sexual fantasies? Kim Kardashian made that sex tape with Ray J and she became famous. Famous!!!!!

I have never done a sex tape and i would not consider doing a sex tape ever. Not even with my husband. Some people enjoy watching themselves give pleasure to another person. It is fine, but not with me.

Sex on its own is an activity that requires a lot of energy. I would not diffuse the energy that brings about a lot of pleasure annd then record it. Sex is for that moment and it ends there, anything else after putting on your clothes and minding your own business is just for the memory.

The internet remains undefeated. People can also be very mischevious or vengeful depending on the situation, so guess what happens, the sex tape you did with your high school boyfriend/girfriend ends up on the internet either as a result of a bet or just plain mischief. I mean lets say i meet a guy i am crazy in love with, like absolutely crazy in love with, then i decide to make a sex tape with him because in my little head we are going to last forever, have kids, grandkids, build empires, travel the world, that kind love. About eight months to two years later, we break up. There are those crazy sex tapes we made, put it onsome USB and forgot about them. On a day he felt like being vengeful or mischevious he puts a preview on his private instagram page for his followers and takes it down within an hour, then uploads it to a porno site.

So some porno watching fan will see me in the store somewhere and start a convo like

stranger:”I think i have seen you before”

me: Really? Where?

stranger: I think i watched your porno video.

me: (speechless)

I don’t even think i have thought of what i would do to save face, but i have actually imagined such a moment and i dont ever want that moment to happen so i won’t make a sex tape.

Sex is a powerful thing. It gives a lot of pleasure and it also destroys, it has destroyed friendships, marriages,  businesses and even political careers. Imagine you want to be a president or a mayor someday and then the video of your sexcapade shows up. It is a recorded action, your life has become a reality show. Then anger and revenge comes out, who sent it? who told? Who did? It would be too late to do damage control. What am i driving at?

Sex tapes are more destructive than useful so why do it in the first place. It is not something that one person is proud to show another person so why waste your time making a sex tape. It can also be used as blackmail most especially when someone does not get their way. It has destroyed potential poitical careers.Unless i decide to become a porn star which is quite unlikely, i wont make a sex tape. I have had freaks as boyfriends in the past and the craziest fantasy ever was a …….. actually it was not a sex tape (smiles).

So whether you are in a relationship or not? Would you ever make a sex tape? Whose sex tape would you watch? (smiles and runs away). Have a hot week.

 

 

relationship

MY 5 RELATIONSHIP DEAL BREAKERS

As the saying goes

“The older we get, our red flags become our deal breakers”

We date people and become friends with them, get to know them better and see if we can get into a certain level of compatibility with them. This also means that “sometimes” we have to accept their flaws because we have ours and we want them to accept us too, but there should be a line between accepting someone’s flaws and a red flag. Those red flags as we have gotten older have become our deal breakers. Here are my top 10

  1. Education: I love men who have a drive for education even if it is just vocational school, a PHD,a Bachelors or something. There is something about having a certificate in your name that shows that you have spent a certain amount of time getting the education and it is useful  for that purpose or more. No one can take that away from you. Once a guy has no passion to better himself in terms of education, that by itself is a dealbreaker for me. It also reflects the way he thinks too. Some people who have lesser educational accomplishments tend to project their sense of insecurities on their partner and please dont argue this fact with me, it has happened to me.
  2. Show Off: Insecure people are the biggest show offs, they tend to want to prove that they have certain things or they are a certain type of people. I am one of the people who doesn’t care. I once dated a guy who always bragged, he bragged about everything. The thing abiut braggers for me is that i always listen to them and ust make my conclusions on their behavior without telling them. Usually they are very insecure and suffer from approval addiction. This is my deal breaker especially after the second date when i am sure that this is a behavioral pattern.
  3. No sense of Humor: I think this should top the charts for me. I find humor in every situation except death and disease. I dont undrstand why  i would have to walk on eggshells in my relationship watching everything i want to say or have to say because he lacks sense of humor. My best friend is a comedian, no matter how bad a situation is, i always have a good laugh or find comic relief, i want to have a relationship filled with good laughs. If i can’t joke or be humorous around him, sorry bro, thats a deal breaker.
  4. A Different Religion: I am a Christian and i cannot date a guy  who is  not a Christian , it is not because i think Christianity is the best religion its just the clash in terms of differences and if one or both of us wil be able to cope or convert. A Catholic guy once tried to date me and through certain conversations i realize he is stuck to his beliefs and we may never be able to compromise, it could cause unwarranted arguments and promote family division when we have kids so i decided to say “deuces”.
  5. Vices: My biggest relationship deal breakers in terms of dating are somoking, drinking and womanizing. These are habits that require money, so before it becomes a deal breaker, how financially stable is the man? Smoking and its adverse smell, i cant deal with that. I love social drinkers, but drinking to stupor is a no no. Womanizing, the art of chasing after anything in skirt when you have a bikini at home, that for me is a deal breaker, i cannot handle the thought of STD’s or unwanted pregnanices, the man can go very farrrr away from me.
fiction · flash fiction

THE AFFAIR

I didn’t mean for it to happen

But it did happen

He was fifteen years older

He was very cute

His marriage was troubled

It affected his work

One day, he graded me wrongly

When i went to him to have my work re graded

He looked at me

It was normal for a teacher to look at his student

But this look was different

It was lustful

He stared at my D cups which were fighting to pop out of my shirt

My D cups

The most attractive part of my body

He winked at me

He changed the 69 to an 89.

Then subsequently my C’s became A’s

He would grab me into the store room

And touch my breasts

I loved the sensation

He licked and sucked on my nipples so good

He would touch my “down there”

It became a daily routine and each day we added new adventures

We always prayed never to be seen as we entered the store room

We enjoyed pleasure for ten minutes or less, sometimes more

My moans of pleasure were usually muffled by the cup of his palm

My legs would become like jelly as the shook while he gave me pleasure

My classmates wondered how i got such good grades

i didn’t need to study

No matter what i wrote, i still scored better than them

i could not tell anyone

my conscience was dead too

as long as i enjoyed myself nothing else mattered.

One day mother nature caught up with me

My visitor didn’t come that month, and also the next month

I told him

He didn’t respond

the next day he didn’t touch me

The day after he avoided me

By the end of the week my grades slipped

I went from 99 to 89

From 89 to 79

My breasts were full

I began to fall asleep in my classes

I was always tired

He was no longer friendly

He embarrassed me in front of the class when my answers were incorrect

He scolded me for being tardy

One day i went back to his office,

He was not there

I decided to check the store room

He usually graded our papers there

Unannounced, i showed up to the store room

Bent on all fours was another young girl, just like me

She was in my class

I was shocked

I ran

I cried

All the way home

At night i cried

Next morning

I went back to school

To the class that now gave me misery

A big, burly woman in her sixties was in front of the board

I sat down and listened to her teach

after she left

I asked about him

He was shot

By the woman who loved him

Feature · love · relationship

AN OPEN LETTER TO MY EX

It started with the phonecall, the voicemail, the text all in that order.

You got my contact info from a friend and the chase began

You checked on me on your breaks at work, you sent me text messages

We talked for hours, opened up to each other, shread secrets, joys, sadness

The list goes on, we became a part of each others lives

I accepted your burdens, your baggage, your past, your vulnerabilites, your insecurities but mine was a sight for sore eyes.

Only to wake up on a Friday morning to realize the whole thing was over.

I wanted you to realize that i wanted to be there for you like no other

I wanted to take care of you when you were ill

I wanted to grow with you

Then i realized maybe we didnt want the same things,

Maybe i was not worth hanging onto in time of difficulty

Maybe i was not the definition of the women you wanted to spend your lie with even when that was what you said. Actions speak louder than words,

The “maybes” are your problem not mine.

There is no need to hang around because you have picked another, and another

 

I chose to love you

I made the commitment to love you but you faltered

You looked for reasons to leave

I love myself

People love me unconditionally and i find comfort in that knowledge

I am worthy of someone who loves me wholly and completely

I am also worthy of getting unconditional love because it is something i am willing to give.

To anyone reading this, self love is utmost. You are the best thing that will ever happen to someone in your future and dont ever think for one second that you are not good enough.