relationship

DISCUSSING THE EX WITH THE PRESENT, IS IT A GOOD IDEA?

Hello Tribe!!!!

It’s been a minute since I wrote

Relationships are sweet and beautiful in the early stages. The honeymoon phase is usually the best,  the need to share and bond comes in.  

Questions are asked like. What is your favorite color? 

Do you like ice cream?  What are your financial goals? Are you buying a house next year? How many people have you slept with? Sex with condoms or nah? 

Everything is perfect.

 Everything is bliss.

And then you get the question about your “ex”.

Would you discuss your ex with your current partner?

  That was me once upon a time when I was like an open book, quick to share my experiences with my exes , good or bad. I had no problem sharing information but then there was this dude that I dated, he came into my life and changed everything 

It all began when I was in love and happy with the new man in my lifetime, everything was perfect, sharing information was nothing . I felt like I was writing in my diary, I felt like I was sharing it with the one who would not judge me .

One day, it backfired. We got into an argument and he brought up the past, the things I said, made reference to my ex, he had to find something to hold onto. I could not believe that a man who claimed to love me would use my past as a reference point in a argument. I learned a valuable lesson, let the past be past, unless the information is necessary, don’t bring it up. I operate on a “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy and I guess it is going to work for me. Some men feel threatened when they find out your ex may have been more handsome and probably made more money. Do ta talk about the restaurants and nightclubs you and your ex once hung out. It is very uncomfortable. I would feel the same way too.  Also don’t talk about what your ex bought you as a present, some people can’t handle those types of truth. Have you ever been so honest with someone that you ended up feeling bad for doing so?

I have been in that situation.

For the potential Bae reading this I will tell you one thing .I don’t want to know how many women you dated or slept with, also don’t put a face to her when you tell me. Some things are better left unsaid. 

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9 thoughts on “DISCUSSING THE EX WITH THE PRESENT, IS IT A GOOD IDEA?

  1. Yassss!!!
    But seriously i will never ever discuss my ex with my present. These men are funny, tomorrow they will use what you told them against you.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Loveeeed this! Great read! I am learning that too! I think its because I just want to be so open in the beginning, but then I remind myself “This person didn’t even deserve to get to know you like that”. The older I get, the more I learn that I don’t need to tell so much of myself. I feel like the things that are important enough for “future bae” to know will eventually come out. I loved this post! Cant wait to read more!

    Like

  3. I would definitely not discuss my ex with my potential bae. Not even as a reference point.
    Interesting topic.

    Like

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